Drafting Guys over 60 in the USA

New Direction for the war on terrorists. Send Service Vets over 60.....

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing backasswards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds.
Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some ass that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18 -year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-.....

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at, and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt. in the 'New army' now, 'Get down and give me .. ER ... one.'

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million po'd old farts with 'attitude' and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!



//This part humor, and part truth. Sent to me by an elder military friend. Author unknown to me.

Question:

Can they keep drawing Social Security while serving?

we'll change that word into "hazard pay"

Ayup - Hazardous Duty Pay - which of course, is not taxable.... he he he

Give us old fogies a break?

If you want to make it even more perfect send several thousand menopausal women, they'll kill anything that doesn't suit them, and nothing suits them!!

After a few years of raising kids - women are to be feared! Terrorists and illegals would be shakin' in their boots.

Not to mention that the older you get the more you take to heart "Work Smarter , Not Harder" . I haven't made it to 60 yet but I'm well past 42 but I could still probably pass the PFT (for my age group ) if they give me a couple extra minutes hours on the 3 mile run.
Iodine, Vicki, I fully agree with you and I'm so glad you're on our side . HAPPY MOTHERS DAY !! to you both .

Thanks NoOne!!