Warning Labels being considered for Alcohol |
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Warning Labels being considered for Alcohol |
 Sep 27 2007, 08:13 PM
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#1
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 Venting Addict  Group: Members Posts: 612 Joined: 21-September 07 From: 1AU from a G2V Star Member No.: 81  |
LIQUOR WARNING
Of course this does not apply to you and me, but you may want to pass this on to other people to warn them. Liquor manufacturers have accepted the Government's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your clothes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, leaving you unable to account for large chunks of time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WARNING: Th e crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel gode . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -------------------- "Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts." "Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster"    |
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Sep 27 2007, 08:21 PM
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#2
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 Who's your Daddy? Group: Moderator Posts: 2,224 Joined: 13-August 07 From: Tampa Bay Area, Florida, USA Member No.: 11 |
We don't need no steekin' warning labels!
-------------------- I know you think you understand what you thought I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant!  |
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Sep 27 2007, 10:20 PM
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#3
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 Advanced Venter Group: Members Posts: 162 Joined: 5-September 07 Member No.: 38 |
Warning: Drinking beer makes you fat, ugly kills your liver and takes your money. Drink water instead. Sponsored by "Dasini"
-------------------- "The fool hath said in his heart, 'There is no God'" (Psalm 14:1; 53:1)
"The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork" (Psalms 19:1) If you were to die today where would you go? Learn how to go to heaven today click here! Have a look at some of the videos I have made on Metacafe! -Austin Z If we are what we eat then I am fried,greasy and 99 cents.(nah I eat healthy most of the time) |
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Oct 5 2007, 03:08 PM
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#4
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 Venter Group: Members Posts: 28 Joined: 25-September 07 From: Australia Member No.: 117 |
How about this?
Consumption of alcohol may cause you to feel better about your problems for a little while, then you go back to feeling even more crap due to a hangover! However I do like a drink every now and then. This post has been edited by LilKitty: Oct 5 2007, 03:08 PM -------------------- I have the heart of a poet and the skills of a geek.
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Oct 6 2007, 10:52 PM
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#5
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 Venter Group: Members Posts: 118 Joined: 14-August 07 From: My Head Member No.: 29 |
Those are all great!!
And some of my college friends wonder why I don't drink....
--------------------  - Avatar graphics courtesy of Shatterheart.net, Celestial Star, and Rauvinne - Sig textures & stamps courtesy of Celestial Star |
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