There is no forum for "relationships" and this is the closest I could get for interpersonal relationships.

Everywhere I go, I see people seemingly obsessed with intimacy. It is so huge, I can hardly begin. I have only met one other person besides myself who is opposed to intimacy, and he's my roommate . But even he says he wouldn't mind it too much if it came at the right time. I, however, think the whole idea of needing or wanting someone else to be absurd. Can people not be self sufficient?

Not only this, but people devote years to the pursuit of this meaningless goal. It has been ingrained into the mind of society that we are supposed to find a mate, and start a family. Ridiculous! I have better things to do (read my "interests" if you're curious. It sums it up nicely).

How I feel is very difficult to put into words. It is a feeling that has been building up over the years. I have no need or desire for intimate relationships, and I don't understand why other people do. Is your own life not worth living that you must involve someone else?

I realize that virtually everyone else has a need and/or desire for intimate relationships, but my intent is not to offend, but to express my feelings and see what other people think .

When I tell people stuff similar to this in person, they either don't believe me, or think I'm a freak of nature. Haha, quite amusing.

You are correct - TV doesn't have a separate forum for this particular subject.

Is there a separate reason you felt a need to address the subject?

I find it very curious that you report you "have no need or desire for intimate relationships" yet you state such here?
And give much more information.

I don't find any faults, just curious.

I am a "loner" for the most part, but I have family & friends that I care about and try to watch over also such as I can/am able.

This post has been edited by DSTM: Jan 12 2008, 03:36 AM

Perhaps the question you should ask is "why don't I have that desire for intimacy that others have?".

I don't mean to be unkind, but the "everyone else is wrong but me" concept is clearly a "red flag" that something may be amiss.

As Conundrum points out, you do appear to be reaching out.

Hopefully, one of us will have the wisdom to say something that resonates with you and helps you through this.

I can offer you one of these - - but don't know if it will help.

Could be you just haven't found the 'right one" yet. I was perfectly happy being single. Loved it in fact. Then one day I got set up on a blind date and bam there he was, and almost 16 years later...still here.

I had a good friend who was 30 before she met and married her husband.

I think you are right in a way. That people put too much emphisis and being with someone and not on finding the right someone.

Maybe there would be alot less divorce if they would do the second?

Most people never find Mr Right, and give up and settle for second best. There is no guarantee that Mr Right now, will still be your Mr Right in 20 yrs time.

It may very well be true that Man is by nature a social being; certainly his world is bound up with Others. And it may well be that the majority of humans tend towards needing "intimate relationships" with Another.
But this does not mean, surely, that all humans must (or should, for that matter) find their ultimate happiness in intimacy or it is the only form for social contact. Nor does it mean, as Vicki rightly mentions, "That people put too much emphisis and being with someone and not on finding the right someone."

Each person must find his own way, and what is best for many is not always best for the individual. As Nietzsche wrote, "Become who you are."

Z

This post has been edited by Zarathustra: Jan 13 2008, 12:08 PM

Well, there is always the simplistic approach

We simply taught our girls that they are the 'cake' and any partner they may choose should be the 'icing'. The cake can stand alone but the icing makes it nicer.

I can only speak for myself but I live and love with my best friend. And whether we marry our best friend or not or whether our best friend remains simply that, a best friend for life, it's the intimacy of friendship that can lift our lives and fill it with love and laughter. Not a bad way to spend this journey through life.

I like that!!!

Sorry for not replying sooner. I got to college Saturday, and they just now fixed the internet. Anyway...

The reason I made this thread is to get other people's opinions, see what they think, perhaps find someone with the same mentality as me. I'm not wanting to change as I like who I am.

Sometimes I like to "vent" and show my true feelings, and what better place than on an internet forum where I'm completely anonymous?

I would be happy to supply more information, but it would be helpful if I could have some questions. The more specific the better. In this way I can also learn more about myself.

If i am correct in thinking you are 19 year's of age ?
When i was your age i pretty much had the same mentality ,i tended to go for meaningless relationship's and never wanted to settle down ,and to be honest i never thought i would .
I met my wife at aged 28 and knew that she was the one ,what you feel now will change (probably),but only when you are ready.
Enjoy being single,find out who you are and then you can (maybe) be happy to share your life with that special someone.

Good luck